Maycember Survival for Midlife Moms

If you hear the word "Maycember" and you laugh and cry at the same time, this episode is for you. The craziness of all.the.things this month, plus your body is already doing its perimenopause thing on top of it. So how do you actually get through this month with your energy, patience, and sanity intact?

In this episode of The Family Fork, I'm sharing my best practices from 23 years of mom life for surviving Maycember without abandoning your health and wellness routines. (And if you don't have a routine yet, I’m showing you how to get started today with every little time and energy!)

We're talking about the two big moves that are going to change how this month feels. Plus, I'm walking you through my own three non-negotiables, exactly how I make each of them easy in May, and what it can look like if you're starting from scratch this week.

I’m also sharing the free Maycember Survival Guide for Midlife Moms that includes all of the resources mentioned in this episode.

What you'll learn:

• Why Maycember hits midlife moms harder than younger moms (hint: your hormones are to blame)
• The exact time-blocking method I use to turn my calendar into a stress-reducing to-do list
• How to decide your one or two daily non-negotiables and why this is the foundation for everything else
• Why anti-inflammatory eating matters more in May than any other month (and how to start with one meal a day)
• My smartwatch hack for getting in 100 ounces of water without sipping all day

Resources & Ways To Connect
- Download the FREE Maycember Survival Guide for Midlife Moms
- Connect on Instagram

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Transcript

Hello, my friend, and welcome back to The Family Fork. I am so glad that you are here with me today, because today we are going to talk about a month that, if you are a midlife mom, you know exactly what I mean when I say it. Maycember.

The blending of May and December that perfectly captures how this month feels. Because somehow, the month of May has become every bit as chaotic and over-scheduled as the holiday season, but without the magic, without the twinkly lights, and without relaxing with a hot toddy at the end of the day.

Let me paint you the picture, because I know you are living it. There are end-of-the-year field trips, end-of-the-year parties and class events. There are final class projects that somehow get assigned with three days notice. What about those summer camp registrations, the ones that everybody else apparently registered for back in February, and now you are scrambling to find a single open spot anywhere in your city.

There is a spirit week practically every single day. There is a new outfit or a new hairdo to plan for. You are balancing award ceremonies with your full-time career. You are getting invited to potlucks and graduation parties. The weather is warming up, which means it is officially pool season, and now you are also panicking because, oh my gosh, have you bought a swimsuit yet?

And the month is just beginning. You are looking at the calendar going, how am I going to make it to June?

I want you to take a deep breath. You do not have to hang on for dear life until summer gets here. You do not have to abandon your health and wellness routines for the next 30 days and hope you can pick them back up in June.

And listen: If you do not have a health and wellness routine yet, this is not the time to wait. I know that sounds counterintuitive when everything around you feels chaotic. But May is actually a perfect time to start, because the tips I am sharing today are simple, they take very little time, and they are going to give you more energy and more stamina almost immediately. You do not need to wait until life calms down to start taking care of yourself. In fact, life is not going to calm down anytime soon, so you might as well start now.

I have been a mom for 23 years.I have been through a lot of Maycembers. And today I am going to share my best practices for surviving this month with your energy, your patience, and your sanity intact, whether you are already in a great routine or you are starting from scratch this week. I am also going to link a free Maycember Survival Guide for Midlife Moms in the show notes. Make sure you grab that, because it has all the resources I am going to mention today, all in one place.

Now, I want to take you back about 10 years, when my oldest son Jack was in middle school and high school. Even back then, way before anyone had coined the term Maycember, the month of May was its own special kind of chaos. We just did not have a cool name for it yet.

And I will tell you, I could never figure out the same mystery year after year. Was Jack forgetting to bring home the permission slip? Was he forgetting to bring home the project assignment sheet? Or were the teachers handing them out at the absolute last minute?

To this day I still don’t know the answer to that question. But what I do know is that no matter how I looked at it, there was always something that needed to be done at the very last minute. A project that was due tomorrow. Cash that was needed for a field trip tomorrow. A costume for spirit week that I needed to figure out by tomorrow.

But here’s the part that really matters. At that time in my life, I was working 60 hours a week and commuting two hours a day. So I had very, very little wiggle room for managing last-minute homework assignments, field trips, class parties, and award ceremonies. I needed to be well-planned ahead of time. I needed to have the energy and the patience to roll with whatever got thrown at me. Because here is the thing, a lot of those last-minute requests were not coming from Jack. They were coming from his teachers and his coaches.

And the very last thing I ever wanted was for Jack to feel like he was a burden, or that he had done something wrong, when honestly, he was just the messenger. He was a kid trying to keep up with everything, just like I was.

So I had to figure out how to build a foundation that supported me through that chaos. And that is exactly what I want to teach you today. Because if you are in midlife, and you are a mom, this month is hitting you even harder than it would have 10 years ago.

Why? Because perimenopause and menopause are already taxing your energy, your sleep, your patience, and your ability to roll with the punches. So when you layer Maycember on top of a body that is already navigating hormonal shifts, it is no wonder you are feeling overwhelmed.

And here is the trap I see so many midlife moms fall into. You tell yourself, I am just going to let my “everything else” slide for the next 30 days. I will get back to my workouts in June. I will eat better in June. I will start drinking my water again in June. And then you arrive at June completely depleted, more inflamed than you were on May 1st, sleeping terribly, and 5 pounds heavier.

Or, on the other side, maybe you tell yourself, I cannot possibly start something new right now, I will just wait until summer. And by summer, you’re still exhausted, and starting something new feels just as hard as it did in April.

I do not want either of those for you. So today, I am going to walk you through two big moves that are going to keep you grounded all month long, whether you are continuing a routine or building one for the very first time. You are going to need four things in May. Energy, patience, stamina, and flexibility. And the moves I am about to share with you are how you are going to help ensure you have all of these.

Let's start with move number one. Plan what you can.

I want you to pull up your calendar, and I want you to put everything on it. And I do mean everything. The events. The award ceremonies. The class parties. The end-of-year banquets. The graduations. Every single thing that you need to attend, I want it on the calendar. And do not forget to add in travel time, because that is where so many of us get tripped up. We forget that getting to the school across town at 5:30 actually means leaving the house at 4:45.

You are also going to block out your work hours. You are going to block out your workouts, your meal planning time. And here is one that’s easy to forget. Block out time to get specific tasks done, like those summer camp registrations. If something needs to happen this month, it goes on the calendar with a time slot.

This is a skill called time blocking, and it is honestly one of the most useful tools I have ever used as a busy mom. Because here is what time blocking does. It turns your calendar into your to-do list. Instead of having a sad, never-ending to-do list on a notepad somewhere, every task gets a container. It gets a start time and a finish time.

I personally use my calendar as a to-do list, and I give myself a specific amount of time to complete each task. When something is time blocked, I move through it so much faster. Because I know exactly what I am doing, when I am doing it, and when I need to be done so I can move on to the next thing. It cuts out the mental load of constantly asking myself, isn’t there something I’m supposed to be doing right now?

Now, the tool I recommend for this is a shared Google Calendar. I love Google Calendar because it is free, it works on every device, every laptop, every phone, and you are probably already using it anyway. Some families love a Skylight calendar, which is that big digital display you can hang in your kitchen, and that works great too.

But the goal is the same. You want to get every single person in the family on board, with all of their activities visible in one place. So at one glance, you can look at the calendar and see what you should be doing, where your teenagers are, where your partner is. Everything is right there, and you are not the only one carrying the mental load of keeping track of everyone's life.

Get this set up this week. Even if your family does not fully buy in, you can still use it for yourself. Just having your own calendar fully time blocked is going to make a huge difference in how this month feels.

Okay, let's get to move number two. And this one is the heart of the episode. Decide your daily non-negotiables.

A non-negotiable is something that you’re going to protect every single day, no matter what is happening. It is not optional. It is not "I'll do it if I have time." It is part of the foundation that keeps you upright through the chaos.

Now, when it comes to health and fitness, you may be thinking “but Ashley, I do not have non-negotiables yet. I am not currently working out. I am not eating anti-inflammatory. I am barely drinking any water.” It’s OK. This episode is for you too, my friend. In fact, this episode might be especially for you, because you do not have to overhaul your entire life to feel better in May. You just need to pick one or two small things and start doing them every single day. That is it. That’s all it takes.

For me, my daily non-negotiables are my workouts, my anti-inflammatory food, and my water. And every single one of these is on my calendar. I know when I am working out. I know what kind of food I am eating. I know when I am drinking my water. None of it gets forgotten, because I have made a promise to myself that these three things are the priority, every single day.

Now, why does this matter so much? Because these non-negotiables are exactly what give you the energy, the patience, the stamina, and the flexibility you need to make it through Maycember.

When you are moving your body consistently, eating in a way that lowers inflammation, and staying properly hydrated, your sleep gets better. Your cortisol comes down. Your cravings calm down. You feel less inflamed, which means your body just feels better in your own skin. And when all of that is happening, guess what? You automatically have more patience. You have more flexibility. You have more capacity to handle whatever Maycember throws at you.

So I want you to ask yourself, what are your one or two non-negotiables for this month? And if you are starting from zero, what is the one small thing you can commit to every single day for the next 30 days?

Let me dig into mine, because I want to give you a sense of what this looks like in real life.

First, workouts. Movement is non-negotiable for me, and I am going to tell you why consistency matters so much. When you work out at the same general time every day, your body knows what to expect. There is a calm that comes from having that routine. Your body is not constantly trying to figure out, are we doing this today or not?

And listen, if you are not working out at all right now, please do not let that stop you from starting today. Your version of a workout this week could be a 20-minute walk around the neighborhood. It could be 10 minutes of a beginner strength workout on YouTube. It could be a few sets of squats and push-ups in your living room before you get in the shower. Movement is movement, and starting small is still starting.

Personally, I work out at home, and in May especially, this is a HUGE time-saver. I am not commuting to the gym. I am not waiting for someone to finish on the machine I want. I have full control over my time, and that flexibility is everything when your schedule is bouncing around.

Working out at home can be as simple as running outside, hopping on a treadmill, or jumping on a stationary bike if you have a Peloton. My personal favorite is weightlifting, and yes, I do that at home too. A couple of sets of dumbbells is all you really need to get a solid strength workout in.

I also love following a pre-planned program. I do not want to be designing my own workout. I want to press play and follow along. Pre-planned programs from expert trainers make sure you are hitting all of your major muscle groups, and they take all of the decision-making off your plate. That is exactly what you need in a month like May. And I have a workout library I love that I’ve linked inside the Maycember Survival Guide, so make sure you grab that from the show notes.

Next, anti-inflammatory nutrition. This is always a non-negotiable for me, but it matters even more in Maycember. When you eat better, you feel better. It is that simple. And you are going to need a lot of energy this month for all the events, all the spirit days, all the ceremonies, all the obligations.

Anti-inflammatory eating supports better hormone balance, which is essential whether you are in perimenopause or menopause. Every single time you put food in your mouth, you are either calming inflammation or fueling it. And in a month like this, you want to be on team calm.

And again, if anti-inflammatory eating is brand new to you, you do not need to overhaul your kitchen this weekend to feel a difference. Even one anti-inflammatory meal a day is going to start shifting how you feel. You can absolutely start there, and build from there.

The way I make this realistic is with my Component Cooking method. You cook three nights a week, and you eat all week long. So in a month when you have extra activities and meetings and events almost every night, you can know that the cooking is mostly done. You are not standing in your kitchen at 7:30 pm trying to figure out what's for dinner. The free Component Cooking meal plan is included in the Maycember Survival Guide.

I also carry anti-inflammatory snacks with me everywhere I go in May. Because here is the truth, you are going to walk into an end-of-season banquet and there is going to be a pizza truck, or a dessert table, or a tray of cupcakes. And it is so easy to get derailed when you are hungry. So I bring my own snacks. There will absolutely be moments when you have to swing through a drive-through with the kids, and that is okay. The Maycember Survival Guide also includes my anti-inflammatory on-the-go guide, which tells you exactly what to order at Chick-fil-A, Chipotle, and the rest of your favorite fast-food restaurants, plus easy snacks you can grab at the grocery store and stash in your purse or in a cooler in the car.

This is not about being difficult. It is not about avoiding the fun foods. It is about supporting your foundation so that you have more patience, more energy, and more flexibility when Maycember tries to come for you.

And finally, water. Listen, I am not the kind of woman who can sip on a bottle of water all day and casually hit 100 ounces. That is not me. So here is what I do instead. I set a timer on my smartwatch that reminds me to drink 8 ounces at the top of every hour.

You do not have time for sipping. Neither do I. So make it easy on yourself. Set the timer, and at the top of every hour, gulp 8 ounces of water and move on with your day.

And honestly, if you are not currently drinking much water at all, this is the easiest non-negotiable to start with today. You do not need to buy anything. You do not need to plan anything. You just need to set a timer and drink. That is it. And you are going to feel a difference within a couple of days.

That water is going to flush toxins out of your body. It is going to keep you hydrated. And all of that translates into more energy, more patience, fewer headaches, and more ability to roll with whatever the day throws at you.

So those are my two big moves. Plan what you can with time blocking, and decide your daily non-negotiables. That is the whole framework.

Now, let's bring it all together.

There is no question that Maycember is chaotic. That is not going to change. But you have a choice in how you walk through it. You can grit your teeth and abandon everything that makes you feel good, and arrive at June completely wrecked. You can wait until summer to start building healthier habits, and arrive at June feeling exactly the same way you do right now. Or, you can build a foundation this week, even if it is the very first time you have ever tried, and give yourself the energy, patience, stamina, and flexibility to actually show up well for your family, your work, and yourself.

If you take nothing else from this episode, here is what I want you to do. This week, sit down with your calendar and time block the entire month of May. Get every event, every commitment, and every appointment on there.

Then pick your one or two non-negotiables. What are the things that you are going to protect every single day, no matter what? Maybe it is a 20-minute walk and 8 ounces of water every hour. Maybe it is a non-negotiable bedtime and one anti-inflammatory meal a day. Maybe it is your full workout routine and your Component Cooking sessions. There is no wrong answer. The right answer is the non-negotiables you will actually do every day.

So sit with that question. What are your non-negotiables for Maycember? When you build that foundation, this month is going to feel completely different. You will walk into June feeling proud of yourself instead of depleted.

Before you go, I want to make sure you grab the free Maycember Survival Guide for Midlife Moms. The link is in the show notes. Inside, you will find the Component Cooking meal plan so you can knock out your weeknight dinners in three sessions, my anti-inflammatory on-the-go guide for fast food, snacks, and travel. And you will find a link to my favorite workout library so you can press play and get moving without thinking about it.

It is everything you need to make it through this month with your health, your energy, and your patience intact, whether you are continuing a routine or starting one for the very first time. Go grab it.

I will see you back here next week, my friend. Until then, take care of yourself, one small bite at a time.